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If you wish to make your kitty happy then let it happen on your kitty terms. Don’t overdo anything and don’t force your kitty in any way. There are right and wrong ways to show love to a cat. For a positive experience here are some useful tips.
1. Let your cat sniff you before you pet her. This is a casual first step towards a good bonding time between you and your kitty. Try extending a hand or finger and allow the cat a chance to touch her nose to you. If she shows no interest in your hand, reconsider the plan some other time. However, if she sniffs your hand, or rubs her head against your hand, chances are she liked it.
2. Respect your cat’s privacy. If your cat loves being pet that doesn’t mean she wants it all the time. Like all other living beings be respectful of her personal space because there may be times when she simply wants to be alone.
3. Cat bumping her head against you. When a cat bumps her head against your body, that means she is seeking for your attention. Try showing her love at once.
4. Begin with a soft chin-scratch. Rub your cat’s chin gently with your hand, particularly where the jawbone connects to the skull below the ears. It's possible the cat will project her chin out, as a pleasure.
5. Look at the areas behind the ears. Apply gentle pressure with your palm. Make her know you are giving her attention and affection. The base of the ears are her scent-markings spots, if she approves your action, she will bump her head or side of her head to scent mark at you.
6. Pet the cheeks just behind the whiskers. Cats likes such experience and if she does she will rotate her whiskers forward.
7. Gently run your hand along the side of your cat’s face. When your cat is near you, try stroking her middle area of the face with one of your fingers while encircling her whole face and stroking the top of the head with your thumb. The cat is all yours.
8. Pet your cat if she sits in your lap and lies. See if your cat likes your lap and lies down to relax, as humans have body heat that makes them comfortable.
9. Pet a cat when she's on her side. Carefully stroke the side that is facing up. If she enjoys the feeling, she will probably meow or purrs, and try to communicate with you.
10. Love the cat from head to tail. Try running your hand from forehead to the base of tail repeatedly and massage her neck muscles gently. Apply gentle pressure and make it a continuous and slow motion in one direction as some cats do not prefer reverse strokes.
11. Talk to your cat softly. Purring is one of the ways a cat signals that it feels sociable and seeks attention and wish you to do the same. This is accompanied with ankle twining and head bumping.
12. Know when your cat doesn't want to be petted anymore. Sometimes petting can become overstimulating. The signs to stop such activity may be a soft bite or scratch.
13. Stay away from the tummy. Cats might roll onto their back and expose their belly, but never try to rub their tummy, as many cats don't like it. She will instinctively hesitate to get strokes in the stomach with all the vital organs.
14. Approach the feet with caution. Begin petting the cat to get her relaxed, then ask permission to stroke her feet by touching one foot once with your finger.
15. Get her new pet cat toys to please her. Afterall a cat owns you, you never own a cat.